I got the call from my surgeon's office informing me I was booked for Sept. 26, 2013. I was floored. That was a whole month to wait to get this cancer out. She told me that this wasn't really that long compared to others, and if she could get me in tomorrow she would. I also knew there were other women that needed to get in quicker. I understood and wrote my appointment down.
I also learned that I had to get mapping done a day before surgery. Mapping??? What is Mapping? My surgeon's receptionist told me it needs to be done before surgery. The correct terminology is Sentinel Node Mapping. It's a radioactive die they inject in your nipple to find the main (front line) lymph node. "You are going to put WHAT in my body?" Yes, I was freaked. To calm me down I just kept singing, "Radioactive, Radioactive." I was so lucky I had my sister Jody and Lori to come to this appointment. Like I said, your in the dark and just having someone with you calmed the storm, even if it was for just a minute or two. I was grateful for those minutes because we would just giggle. A good giggle is sometimes all you need. I went for my mapping, did a CT scan and was ready for surgery the following day.
During that time I started getting into battle mode. I mean it's not easy finding your way. There were so many words I didn't want to use when it came to my diagnosis as I was already so wrapped up in my roller-coaster emotional ride. I know that many women use the word "Journey" when describing their own heartache with their Cancer but I was truly well into a journey of my own. I didn't want Cancer to define me or choose my path. I wanted to control it and make it my story, so I call it Julie's Quest. Quest to me means, A to Z, power and fierce. It also makes me feel like a kickass Warrior! Haha
I am also so blessed to have a couple of amazing warriors by my side. They have been nothing but supportive and loving. These two individuals below have been in my life since I was a rockin', cool, badass teen and have always been able to make me giggle and they didn't disappoint! They call themselves my Ninjas.
This is Mama Peg. She has long been one of my favorites... always keeping me wanting to be crazy and live my life to my fullest. Sadly her strengths come from experience. Her life has gone through great pain, but never blinked an eye when hearing of my diagnosis. "Keep that convo for the garage."
I love you Pegsters...
I have something absolutely hilarious for you all to read. Two days after my diagnosis, my momma Pegs wrote me this. My whole family was with me as I read this text out loud. Let's just say, it lifted all of our spirits and put us in the ugly laugh. Thanks Mamma! Here it is for you all to enjoy...
Hey pretty lady. I think you must be psychic. I have been thinking about you constantly since Krista told me about the damn stupid cancer. I am going to be in Calgary on the 4th of September and will come and see you.
Don't worry to much its just cancer you and me and everyone else who loves you will send lightning bolts of energy at that stupid lump. It's going to flee in terror and take any of its hangers on with it.
So here's what I want you to do. Find a quiet space put on a song that's light and happy and makes you smile. for me it's brown eyed girl or feeling groovy, then sit back with a glass of wine and a fat doobie and think about all of us who love you.
Imagine we are your army aiming ninja kicks and karate chops at that cancer, but please make sure I look like Sigourney weaver in the aliens, she was one Rambo tuff broad! You can make Krista laura from from tomb raiders, Nathan should be michelangelo from the tmnt. Anyways you get the idea everyone you love, your girls your mom your friends are all this elite fighting force and we are attacking the cancer from every side. Course we are singing a jive talking as we go.
Even in battle we need comic relief. You'll probably feel warmer, battles bring up a fierce sweat(thank god you won't be able to smell us since we'll be inside you.)
Just think of everyone's love turned into this fighting force that is going to corral the cancer and starve it to nothingness!
You will win this Jules. It's gonna be scary hon I know it. Just grit your teeth and lean on all of us. Hey you made it thru tummy tuck and even if they do a mastectomy you can get bigger better boobs.
Maybe they make them with teeny tiny motors so when your bored you can make them dance and jiggle like a bowl of jelly!
Jules you are an amazing loving woman now you have to be a determined fight women. No thoughts but how your going to kick cancer in the jewels and take it down!
I am your captain baby. Every night I am going to concentrate my thoughts on your boobies.
That sounds kinda gay and creepy but I'm chuckling cause I see them doing a little dance to we are the champions!
I'll text you every day if you'd like. I think we might need a write down all your fighting forces and then get Nate to bring them to comic life.
Love you Jules always in your corner and in your booby.
Love mama peg.
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